11/30/2010

Grinchin' It Up

I'm being a grinch. Yesterday & Sunday I finally felt like I was starting to get into the holiday spirit. I was even disappointed this morning when the other employees asked if we could play something other than Christmas music. I don't know what happened...well, I do know what happened. I have been talking to my patients about travel plans for the holiday season and the more I talk about my travel plans, the less I want to do them. I mean, don't take it the wrong way. I want to go home. I want to spend Christmas with my family. But to do that, it means that a) I'll be home less than 24 hours and b)I'll miss games & movies on Christmas night. I would drive up to Fay on Thursday night, drive up to MD Friday morning, drive back to Fay Saturday afternoon and then back down to Charleston Sunday morning. I don't know what to do! It's just so much driving in such a short period of time. I could fly...but it's expensive and I don't know what I'd do with my dog. I could have my dad come down here (or I could go up there) but the idea of that prospect is depressing. We won't exchange gifts because he'll say he can't afford anything and he is the MOST difficult person to buy for in the history of difficult people. We'll go to dinner and then come back home and sit in silence. That's almost more depressing than sitting around by myself. I just don't know what to do...
I can hear C now. He'd say "Aw, buck up babe, lots of people spend Christmas by themselves. I'm doing it. You can always come down here. We'll lay on the couch all day and watch movies." Maybe we'd even make grilled cheese & tomato soup. Except he won't speak to me to say that so he is not saying it. Plus, he's got his new gf now (maybe, I dunno if that's true or not but for the sake of my pity party it is now) so there is not room for me there.
I'm just throwing a pity party for myself right now. I'm sure I have friends in the area I could spend Christmas with but it's just not the same. I want to go home. But I want to go home without stressing myself out to the max with 20 hours of driving in a 96 hour period. :(

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