I made the decision to move back to North Carolina. It didn't take a ton of thought. Well, the location did. But leaving the city did not. There are aspects of city life that I like. I'll start with those.
1. the wide variety of restaurants
2. the variety of things to do - improv, music, theater
3. The summer time is easy living!
4. Being close to my brother & his girlfriend (Guess that's not so much big city living as the location)
5. ......I thought this list would be a lot longer.
Let's move onto the things I don't like:
1. Everyone is always in a rush and thinks the smallest things inconvenience them far more than it actually does.
2. There is a wide variety of people. Which isn't a big deal. But it's easier when everyone is like you. I like being able to say Merry Christmas. Here in the city, you have no idea if people celebrate Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanza, Serbian Christmas, the month of December, nothing at all....you get the idea. And if you say Merry Christmas to the wrong person...oh no! You've insulted them and their entire family and everyone they know and they'll let you know it.
3. People don't think about how they treat other people. And since I'm accustomed to being nice, I get run over. A lot. People don't think twice about cancelling plans with me last minute. People don't think twice about making me work extra without asking me. People don't think twice about anything. And when I try to be like that, I have a bad attitude and I'm not being myself.
4. I don't like the person I'm turning into. I don't want to rush everywhere. I don't want to think only of myself. I don't want to feel like being a nice person means I'm going to get run over. It shouldn't be that way.
So the lists are actually about even. Which is surprising. But here's the tipping point: I want to be closer to family. I grew up in North Carolina and that feels like home to me. Even though I won't be (and don't want to be) living in my hometown, I'll be close enough that when I have a bad day and just need the comfort of familiarity, it's within reach. I like the food down there. (This should probably be a post for another day) I like the weather down there better.
I toyed with the idea of moving back to Charleston. It was between Raleigh and Charleston. Both are familiar. Both have people that I care about. But I tried Charleston and it didn't work for me. I don't know that enough has changed in the last 2 years that it will work for me. I don't want to put everyone I know in Charleston through that - my former coworkers, my friends, etc. How do I ask them to accept me again and then decide it's not for me? If I up and leave again, it's just not right. So I'll give Raleigh a try and see how it goes. I'm excited about the move. I'm excited to be back in the South. I'm excited to have manners again. I'm excited to be treated like a person again!