So I'm quickly becoming a cat lady. Well, not an actual cat lady because I'm mildly allergic to cats so I won't have a real cat. But I should probably pick up some kitty food and bottles of wine when I'm at the grocery store because I'm going to be single forever.
Why would I ever say such a thing? Because it's true. My mom even tried to set me up with someone. Now I may not have had the most heartwarming response to this. I think I even groaned. I mean, it's my mom. Setting me up. Gross. But, as I was informed, when you hit 30 and can't keep a boyfriend, your mom starts to worry and has to take things into her own hands. Well. I guess I'm there. But then she didn't even set me up! I don't know whether to be relieved that I didn't have to go through with that or humiliated that even my mom has decided I'm going to be alone forever and therefore there was no need to try and set me up. Eesh. Either way...sad.
Now since May, after the demise of my last relationship, I decided I wouldn't date again for the rest of the year. I've stuck to that but now that the year is coming to a close, I'll admit I'm getting a little curious as to what's out there and if I'm missing out on anything. I signed up for match.com. I've tried internet dating before and had...ok...results. I mean, I ended up dating a guy for 2 years that I met off there. That didn't end well since I'm not as cool as pot. I dated a couple other guys for a couple months here, a couple months there. All ending in break-ups but I didn't get murdered. Figure I might as well give it another try. I'll either find the love of my life or get murdered. 50/50 chance right?
So. Here I go on Match. I've been on there for about a month. I've sent about 25 emails. Responses? None. I've winked. Responses? None. I've gotten emails. From 60 year old black men who don't want "a hood rat." I mean, I'm not a hood rat. But I'm also not interested.
I don't know. Is dating even worth it? I'm so on the fence if dating would be a good thing or not. To me, it seems like it just ends in heartache. Why do I want to put myself through that? Maybe I'm not actually ready to date since just thinking about it makes me want to bury my face in mashed potatoes. (for comfort...not for any other reason)