I almost called Early tonight. Almost. I stopped myself. I realized how awkward the convo would have been. it's been nearly a month since I've talked to him. yes I miss him but what would I say? I could say that much plus a little more but then what? I would need more. I couldn't just say "I miss you" bc that wouldn't be enough. I need more and I guess I'm not prepared to say more. I don't think I could say enough to change his mind. Instead I buried myself in dental info and researching the foaming agent in toothpaste. Sodium lauryl sulfate or sodium n-lauryl sucinate in case you were wondering. Dental information is always nice & comforting. It can't mislead you. It only gives you facts and let's you interpret them.
Now if only I could make my neighbors (not a and w) quiet down so I could get some sleep and get Early out of my head before I convince myself to call him and make a fool out of myself.