I'd like a side of low self-esteem & a muffintop with that soda!

I'm getting chubby..tubby...hefty...whatever you'd like to call it. I'm working on eating more healthily and also on going to the gym more. My goal is 3 "mega" workouts a week...by mega, not very mega but more running and ninja class. And 3 "mini" workouts - which will be mostly ab work and a little bit of plyometrics. I would like to get rid of 6 1/2 pounds. Actually I'd like to get rid of 11 1/2 pounds but I'll settle for 6 1/2.

Reach out and Touch Somebody

I'm working on being more ok with physical touch. I really really dislike being touched. I know that's weird - but there are not many people I'm ok with being touched by. In an effort to become a better coach to my cheerleaders I am trying to become more comfortable with physical touch, in hopes that one day, I can actually hug someone without cringing. Yes, I cringe.
I set a goal of touching 3 people each day - it could be a hug, a pat on the shoulder, a high five...any sort of contact.
Day 1: a fake pat on the shoulder to a coworker who knows of this goal. It still counts.
Day 2: nothing. I thought about it but it all seemed so awkward.
Day 3: I patted a guys shoulder as he left the dental office and said "It was so nice to meet you!" It was very nice to meet him. It was not so nice to touch him.
Day 4: More thinking, less touching.
How do I get over this???

I miss Casey

That's it. All I have to say.

ew

I am starting to gross myself out - I ate a whole frozen pizza by myself tonight. I have been trying to improve my diet - sodas on the weekend only and I have been taking my lunches. I've been trying to buy more fruits and vegetables and recently found about this really cool thing I want to try: CSA. It is Community Supported Agriculture and they will deliver enough fruits and vegetables on a weekly basis to feed 2-3 people. It lasts for 6 weeks and is only $115. Unfortunately, they are not taking new subscribers...but I'm going to keep checking back until I can get signed up.
Tonight's pizza threw me off though. I did have juice with it (and 100% juice not a juice-ish drink) instead of soda. But really? A whole pizza? Gross. I just couldn't stop.

Patience with Patients

This was my patient the other day: (well...not really but it really did look like her!)

Here is how our conversation went:
(pt arrives 15 min late for a 50 minute appt)
Me: Hi, we're getting a late start so we'll get thru as much as we can. This is what we have on file for your medical history. Does this all look correct?
Crazy Lady: Oh, you've never done this before. Is it new?
Me: I just want to make sure everything is accurate and up to date.
Crazy Lady: (5 min later...) um, yes I think it's all correct.
Me: Ok. Are you still taking these medications? *point to specific part of screen*
Crazy Lady: I'm not sure.
Me: Ok, are you still taking Toprol?
Crazy Lady: What's that for? Is that the blood pressure one?
Me: I'm not sure, it's your medication. Do you still take it?
Crazy Lady: I don't know. What's Avesis? I don't know what that's for.
Me: Ok, well do you know if you still take 4 medications?
Crazy Lady: I don't know.
Me: Do you have ANY IDEA what you actually put in your body? (ok I didn't really say that but I wanted to!)
Me: I'm going to go ahead and lean your chair back. *chair reclines all the way back*
Crazy Lady: Oh, do I need to take my lipstick off?
Me: You don't have to. *glancing at clock...down to 25 minutes*
Crazy Lady: Well is it going to be smeared all over my face?
Me: I can't guarantee it won't *especially since I'd really like to smear it right about now*
Crazy Lady: Well I need to take it off then. *chair goes back up*
*15 whole minutes or so pass by without an incident*
Me: I'm going to go get Dr. X so he can do the exam.
Crazy Lady: Well he referred me to an orthodontist because I feel like this tooth is off colored and out of place. Don't stand behind me! I can't see you!
Me: The only way to fix that tooth is further ortho ma'am. I'm going to get the Dr.
Crazy Lady: But he already referred me. Doesn't this tooth look off color? When people take pictures of me I look like I'm from the hills of Kentucky with a blacked out tooth! *for the record...the tooth was MAYBE 1 shade lighter than the rest of her teeth*
Me: I'll be right back.
*20 minutes pass by for the exam (which should take less than 5) in which she asks the same questions over and over*
Dr. X: She's definitely gotten crazier since her last visit.

Teeny Tiny Violins

Yes, I hear them...they've been accompanying me all day long. They are the music to my pity party. This is why I don't date people. I try very hard not to be a jealous person...but when I get ignored all day long...well, my mind starts to assume the worst. Ugh. Dating blows. I'm done with it.

SOMEBODY CALL 911!

It's an emergency....or at least it better be. I got a phone call from someone we'll call....Devin. He lives in a magical land called Nohio where everyone tries to escape and move to South Carolina. Nohio has obviously sucked in Devin and he can't escape. He decides to call me at 10:55 pm on Thursday night. This is how the voicemail goes:

Devin: EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY! Call me back right away. It's really really really really really really really really really important. It must be resolved within 7 days or bad things will happen. Call me back.

What could possibly be so bad in Nohio, you ask?? He ran out of Duke's mayonnaise and apparently bad things will happen if Devin does not get more Duke's in 7 days.